Langkawi Part 3: Hotel & Beach

Holiday Villa Beach Resort & Spa

We paid RM1,200 for the AirAsia GoHoliday! package which included a 4D3N stay at Holiday Villa and return air tickets as well. We opted for Langkawi instead of Redang as snorkelling isn't her cup of tea! Sigh...

Main lobby

The interior is decent for a four-star hotel. The room was a bit of a let down though. Run down, with holes and patches of fungi on the leaking wall, ancient furnitures, and blocked bath tub.

The Room

The rooms are in dire need of an over-haul. We kept hearing tap water being turned on and off from the next room. She said, "Can hear next door one... I don't like it!".

Big-ass swimming pool

The plus side is that the hotel boasts to have the largest swimming pool in the whole Langkawi. It has a jacuzzi attached to the main pool, which was fun according to Her.

Walking across the pool will bring you to a walkway which gives you direct access to the beautiful beach. Numerous sunbeds are scattered all around, one can pull them far out into the shore too!

The beach is quieter compared to Pantai Cenang's, and if a quiet evening stroll along the beach is what you hope for, this is da place!

Unadulterated!

Dinner for two by the beach, which led to ...

Sunset

The package included daily American breakfasts at the hotel's Lagenda Restaurant. Food are basic at best - bread, croissants, bacons, eggs, porridge with condiments, baked beans, fried rice, mee hoon, sausages, hash browns, fruit juice, coffee and tea. Repeat daily.

The restaurant is packed every morning. Seeing that our breakfast expenses were taken care of, we made it a point to wake up before 8.30am every morning. But dunno why, everytime reach restaurant already 10am...

While having to wake up early and ingesting the same food over and over again dampens the spirit, experiencing the poor table service really screw one's psychological well-being. Due to the inherent geographical features in the Lagenda Restaurant, be sure to choose your table with care so as not to get infested with flies!


Finally, when it was time to leave, it rained cats and dogs. Here's a picture taken from the room's balcony on the morning of our departure:

... to be continued in Langkawi Part 4.

Langkawi Part 2: Car Rental

The most efficient mode of transport on Langkawi Island is by driving a car, especially if you're staying far away from Kuah Town. This was what I've been told anyway, and I couldn't have agreed more. This brings on to the issue of car renting.

During off-season, car renting is actually quite affordable in Langkawi. Car and scooter rentals are available in the Langkawi Airport itself, and from the hotels, and scattered all around the island. Yours truly opted to rent a car from the airport itself. Bargain punya bargain, I finally clinched the deal with one Mr. Kanna(sai) manning the car rental counters in the arrival hall. His counter is at the right corner, so guys beware of this Kanna(sai).

Mr. Kanna(sai): Aiya, banyak murah la. Since lu gua punya first customer of the day, gua kasi lu RM140. Wira tau! Kaunter lain kasi Kancil je...

KK: Tak jadik la, skang off season. Kasi potong lagi itu harga...

Mr. Kanna(sai): *Turns to his accomplice* Beb, RM140 untuk Wira, tiga hari, lu kasi bilang mana mau carik...

Mr. Accomplice: Heh heh heh... *shake shake head* Dahla ada RM10 petrol dalam tank...

KK: RM130. Tekkid or leavid...

Mr. Kanna(sai): Okok, first customer punye pasai, 130 pon 130 la. Mai kasi sign sini... pastu lu gi pintu masuk utama amik kete. Wira PCQ 8683. Kawan gua antar sana. Gua nyer hp 019-5951280. Call gua anytime.

While waiting at the airport's main entrance, we were admiring the newish Toyota Corolla the other group had rented and regretted slightly for not renting a higher end car. "Wat the heck, we get the Wira at a bargain!", we thought. And we continued waiting, hoping for a brand new Wira Special Edition. When this Ah Beng-nified Wira zoomed past us and screeched to a halt a few metres away from us, our jaws dropped 30 cm simultaneously. The number plate read "PCQ 8683".

Silver 16" sports rims, modified grille, growling sports exhaust pipe, small-diameter-fake-sticky Momo steering wheel, stinko cushion seats. Mamamia, and faulty power windows. Tell me I tulan or not? Summore say got RM10 petrol, when we got in the empty tank light already lit. WTF?!

Pantai Kok

Feeling cheated, I drove the junk straight to the nearby Pantai Kok with the sole intention of drowning it. Who would have thought I would be so easily mesmerised by the modestly scenic Cock Bitch Kok Beach, and slowed down, and did something utterly unpredictable!

Din see dat coming dincha?!

Cam-whoring with the junk-metal! After clowning around with the junk, we'd decided its time has come, and it shall find eternity in the deep ocean for being so smelly and old. I then thrusted the gear stick into 1 position, floored the pedal, and steered the wheels towards the water. That piece of junk retaliated by rattling, grunting, moving sideways and finally spun itself 180 degree, looking for a way out of the beach!

That attracted the attention of two Life Guards (I later learnt they were actually locals passing by that area). They ran over and checked the junk-metal. I acted selamba (selamba = meaning as though nothing is happening in Malay).

Junk-metal had cleverly submerged its front wheels in the protective soft fine sand, rendering it immovable. Not only that, it transmitted S.O.S. signals to an Isuzu 4WD Squad requesting assistance from its impending death. Junk-metal had escaped from its death sentence!

Moral of the story is, never rent a car from Mr. Kanna(sai). If you're renting from other company, do rent a 4WD if you're planning to bring the car into the ocean.

P/s: While there are some fiction injected here and there in this post, do take note that doing business with Mr. Kanna is not advisable! More on this later (if I remember that is).

... to be continued in Langkawi Part 3.

Langkawi Part 1: Arrival

Duty-free island

We touched down at Langkawi Airport on Monday noon. The journey from LCCT took less than an hour. After collecting our checked luggage, we proceeded to rent a manual transmission Wira at a bargain - RM130 for 3 days. Bargain because the lowest price the other counters offered was RM140 for a brand new Kancil.

The Super Ah Beng Wira

We learnt the hard way that cheaper is not always better in terms of car renting in Langkawi. More on this later. With the help of the free maps from the airport, we drove up to Holiday Villa Beach Resort & Spa at Pantai Tengah, our accommodation for the next 3 days.

Holiday Villa Beach Resort & Spa, Langkawi

... to be continued in Langkawi Part 2.

Progress Photos

Warning! This post contains grotesque photos of semi-naked male bodies. Viewer's discretion is advised! Click on "[+]Read More..." to proceed!

These photos are freshly taken this morning post-workout at the gym. The hunk on the right is Mr. Fel.



We made a trip to Egonutrition, and spent a fortune (collectively) on supplements. Mr. Fel bought ON's Whey, Mr. Seng bought BSN's N.O.-Xplode. And I'm stacking my Nitrotech with Axis Lab's Creatine Ethyl Ester capsules. Whooooaarrgghhhh...!

Nitrotech

My gym weapon for now - Nitrotech + Lipo6

The shift from ON's 100% Whey to Muscletech's Nitrotech Hardcore see a tremendous energy boost and increase in fatigue threshold! The presence of a crazy gym partner a.k.a. spotter, Mr. Seng, makes daily gym training a hardcore experience. If not for the caffeine and yohimbine-containing Lipo-6, I would've stacked Muscletech's NanoVapor (nitric oxide + creatine). Bring it on!

Medical Grads Found Doping!

KUALA LUMPUR, April 5: Three medical graduates who are currently unemployed were found by a strict fitness instructor at a local gym to be taking explicit drugs containing the sex-enhancing drug Yohimbine, bronchodilator Theophylline, compounds containing Adrenaline, and guggulsterones, among others.

Leading the pack of drug users is Mr. Felix (name changed to maintain anonymity), who is taking Ergopharm's Ergolean AMP v.2 (AMP2). It is purportedly to be the most effective thermogenics in the market, with rave reviews in many online forums. No wonder Mr. Felix was hooked instantaneously.

Refusing to lose out, Mr. Seng (again, real name withheld) got himself America's most powerful cutting capsule, the Muscletech's Hydroxycut Hardcore. This Hydroxycut comes in liquid capsules like the rest, and can ignite internal inferno. On his first day doping the Cut, Mr. Seng was already benching 80kg of weight!

Wanting to be known only as "Mad-K", he got himself a bottle of the infamous Nutrex's Lipo-6, which is no doubt a molotov cocktail disguised in capsules. It contains Yohimbine, which is able to make every part of the body rock-hard! Mad-K is on his way into the Mr. Universe arena, and is planning to make a trip to Langkawi to tan his rocky body end of this month.

Attempts to notify the Ministry of Health was in vain because the Malaysian hotline was never working. When the university's Dean of Medicine was contacted, he could only shake his head and sob in deep remorse. "Medical grads nowadays...", said he, profusely shaking his head. - ROITERS/BERNEMA.